All You Need Is Love

"Are you ready?" Three little words that constantly come up you when you are expecting a child. Everyone asks it. Everyone gives you their piece of mind on how to be "ready." And it seems to be the number one excuse of absentee parents...."I'm not ready."

Erin Pitts Photography

My response to that....there is no "ready." It doesn't exist in the world of parenting. You could read every parenting book out there, take parenting classes or watch countless videos of how to take care of a baby. That doesn't make you ready.

Becoming a parent is a whirlwind of excitement and fear of the unknown. But to be ready there is only one thing you need. LOVE. Unconditional, undying, heart feels like it's gonna burst out of your chest, out of this world type of love.

If you selflessly love your child, then every decision, every action you take on their behalf, comes from love. How can you be wrong if you are acting out of love for them?

 As a parent you only want the very best for your child. Of course, you will question every decision you make. Is it right? Is it what's best? Am I being a good parent? Second-guessing yourself is just a parental instinct that won't go away. Heck, the second you leave the hospital with your bundle of joy to go home and there are no more nurses or doctors to ask for help and that sudden feeling of "Holy smokes, I'm really on my own here with this tiny human" sets in....about a million worries and concerns will pop into your head! But take a deep breathe and realize it's going to be ok. All you need is love. A love that there will be countless times where you just gaze at your child and well up with tears just because you truly love them so much it hurts.

Although they can't communicate yet or thank you for your love, babies can certainly feel it. Through holding them close to your body, letting them listen to your heartbeat and creating a nice, relaxing loving environment. Before you know it they will be cooing for you, then clinging to you, hugging you, looking to cuddle up with you, giving you kisses and eventually be able to say the words "I love you." Which from what I hear is an incredible moment where I guarantee when my daughter says that to me I will be crying tears of pure joy and happiness. I'll be a blubbering fool.

One of my all time favorite songs is by Bob Dylan titled, "Make You Feel My Love." I sing it to Aubrey every time I rock her to sleep. I feel that the last verse explains the immense love you have for your child when you become a parent;

"I could make you happy, make your dreams come true
There's nothing that I would not do
Go to the ends of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love" 

Melissa Bergen Photography

So to all the expecting parents, those in the adoption process, even those taking in an older child, remember one thing, all you need is love. You will be ok. Don't worry about "being ready." It will come naturally. And to those parents absent simply because they are afraid that they aren't ready, what are you waiting for? A rock to fall out of the sky and hit you in the head? A baby won't judge you. They only want to give back the love that they receive. And every day that passes by where you aren't in their life is just another day of missed opportunities and memories you can't get back, another day where you miss out on the most incredible love there is in the world.

As Elizabeth Stone once said, "Making the decision to have a child - it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." I wish that all the parents out there get to experience this type of love the way I do for my child. For any obstacles you may encounter along the way as well as the triumphs, all you need is love. Shower them with your love and your heart will be forever full.

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 A reminder to try not to blink. They grow too fast. Here is my daughter's transformation during her first year. It's absolutely incredible how much happens during the first year, take it all in.
And take pictures, lot's of pictures and videos. You will cherish the memories for a lifetime to come.

Melissa Bergen Photography